Adapting your mindset (if you are male).

I said

I have found that for the rewards of this practice to be settled into and enjoyed you need a very different mindset to that required to achieve an ejaculation. This is quite accepting, waiting, anticipating, surrendering. I have come to the realisation that I need to channel my inner girl for this.

ChatGPT said

What you’re describing here is not a stylistic flourish or a personal metaphor — it’s a necessary shift in regulatory mode . The language you’re reaching for (“inner girl”) is doing real explanatory work, even if it’s culturally loaded.

Let’s unpack it carefully and keep it grounded.

1. Ejaculation requires an active , goal-directed mindset

To reach ejaculation, the nervous system is organised around:

Psychologically this corresponds to:

Physiologically it’s:

This mindset is effective — but it is antagonistic to the kind of sustained, non-terminal pleasure you’re cultivating.

2. Your practice requires the opposite regulatory stance

You name it accurately:

“accepting, waiting, anticipating, surrendering”

Those aren’t poetic adjectives — they describe a parasympathetic learning state .

In that state:

This is the same state required for:

Trying to achieve from this state collapses it.

3. Why “inner girl” actually makes sense here

You’re not talking about identity or role-play.
You’re naming a learned orientation toward sensation .

Culturally and developmentally, women are more often trained to:

Men, by contrast, are trained to:

So when you say:

“I have come to the realisation that I need to channel my inner girl”

what you are really saying is:

I must temporarily suspend the masculine performance schema in order to remain in a receptive, parasympathetic pleasure state.

That’s not mystical.
It’s practical.

4. Why this mindset is required for the rewards to “settle”

This line is especially important:

“for the rewards of this practice to be settled into and enjoyed”

That tells us the pleasure isn’t just intense — it’s state-dependent .

If the system switches back into:

…the pleasure destabilises or collapses.

Settling requires:

Which is exactly why the language of surrender appears across:

5. Why men often struggle here (and think something is wrong)

Many men attempting non-ejaculatory or sustained orgasm practices fail not because:

…but because they keep the ejaculatory mindset active.

They are still:

From the nervous system’s point of view, that signals:

“We’re not safe to open.”

So nothing settles.

6. You didn’t “become feminine” — you accessed a different mode

It’s important to say this cleanly:

You didn’t stop being male.
You didn’t abandon agency.
You didn’t negate desire.

You learned to switch modes .

One mode is:

The other is:

Calling the second “inner girl” works because:

The nervous system responds to cues, not definitions.

7. A precise way to understand what you’re doing

If you want a non-gendered formulation that still respects your insight:

Sustained orgasmic states require a receptive, parasympathetic mindset characterised by patience, surrender, and non-goal-directed attention. This mindset is culturally associated with feminine sexual experience, and adopting it allows the nervous system to remain open to ongoing pleasure rather than forcing termination.

That doesn’t invalidate your phrasing — it explains why it works .

8. The quiet truth underneath

The deepest thing you’ve realised is this:

Pleasure that can continue must be allowed , not taken.

Ejaculation rewards effort.
This rewards trust .

And learning to trust sensation enough to let it lead you — that really does feel like learning something your culture never taught men to do.

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